top 7 reasons why i can't have children yet

don't get me wrong, i love kids and babies. but when it comes to having one of my own...that's another matter altogether.

1. i am still too selfish. i would rather watch my favorite tv show than take care of a crying, squealing baby.

2. when i take care of other people's kids, i can always give them back when they start crying. but when it's my own, then i cant pass them off to other people. and i have no idea how to make a crying baby stop.

3. i dont know how to wrap gifts or to put plastic covers on books and notebooks. and im too lazy to learn

4. i havent been able to save money in the bank. not even a peso. and we all know that babies need a lot of money even if they dont have the vaguest concept of what money is

5. i dont know how to discipline. when a kid demands something from me, i immediately give in because i hate seeing them throw tantrums or cry or be mad at me for any reason. and i sometimes bribe kids into liking me.

6. i'm still very much a kid myself

7. i have such a low threshold for pain. childbirth scares the heck out of me. so there