no other way except up

how bad was my week, let me count the ways

1. i moved on my own. okay, this was supposedly good news because i have now officially become an independent adult. but going up and down 10 flights of stairs with your gazillion things with only your company driver to accompany you is no joke. and then learning that the said driver got sick for two days only worsened the feeling

2. and said gazillion things have still not been unpacked. why, you may ask? sheer laziness and lack of enthusiasm. plus i have this magical ability to know exactly where my things are in that mess, so my mind is kinda telling me, there's no hurry to unpack

3. i may have damaged a few relationships along the way because of stupidity, recklessness and utter lack of responsibility towards people i have come to regard as family. and i am too embarrassed to even attempt to mend them

4. i got locked out of my house the other night and had to spend the night alone at the office. again, stupidity is the cause. maybe i've been having such a bad week because my stupid gene is acting up again

5. all that confidence in myself that i've developed for the past few months have temporarily (i hope) gone on vacation. i feel awkward, unworthy, unpretty, stupid (there's the word again) and momentarily lost. or it may just be that time of the month

6. "but i'm in too deep. you know i'm such a fool for you. you got me wrapped around your finger...." - please don't let this be my song (note to self)


so my goal for next week is: STOP WHINING
as i told a friend a few nights ago, when you're this down, tomorrow definitely has to be better cause you can't go any other way except up

i'm heading off to tagaytay in a few hours and even though this is a company mandated planning, i sure am happy just to get out of manila for a few days and maybe, just maybe, i might find my mojo and juju back